La belle labels

It's been a bit of a journey, this home-brewing lark. Here's a slideshow of my first eight homebrew labels.

Die Hard, Brew Harder

Homebrew number six: Die Hard

So it turns out that this brewing lark, which only a few weeks ago had me believing it was the sole reason I had been put on this planet, ain’t so easy.

I’m sad to say my sixth brew, Die Hard, is something of a disappointment. That’s not to say it’s undrinkable or even unpleasant. It’s a perfectly drinkable, perfectly pleasant homebrew. And therein lies the problem: it tastes and smells like homebrew. 

V for Victory was such a wonderful success because it didn’t taste like homebrew; it tasted like beer. Proper Beer. Beer you might get from a shop or in a pub. Beer you might pay money for (though, to be fair, it could have done with a wee bit more carbonation, while the coffee did push it towards the cardboard side, but I’m being very critical here).

So, what did I do different with Die Hard, a very popular Golden Ale kit from St Peter’s? Well, I followed the instructions and nothing else. No coffee, no dry-hopping, no hop teas, no isomerisation. Just followed the instructions on the tin and nothing else. In many ways, doing nothing was as much an experiment as hacking the Cooper’s stout was for the previous brew. Well, I ain’t doing it again. From now on it’s adjuncts and dry-hopping and boiled-up malt extracts.   

   

Anyway, first thing Die Hard hits you with is that carbon dioxide-fuelled homebrew twang; that pungent, sour aroma that, well, tastes and smells like homebrew. Thankfully, it fades away quickly, and the light hop flavour and sweet malts do come through. Not overly complex, but enjoyable enough. And unlike V, there's plenty of fizz.

Reflections

So it turns out I'm not off the drink at all. Turns out You were right, I was talking rubbish.

Lasted until Monday, when I headed on down to the Print Works in Glasgow to check out the artwork to go with the Williams Brothers venture at Drygate in the city's plush east end. Better beer blog thebeercast did a write up, and so did the Creative Review. I thought the artworks were brilliant, mostly. The lager good; the IPA fantastic; and the apple ale ... well, it wasn't for me.

Anyhow, guess what! Turns out I'm really not off the drink at all whatsoever. Thursday I headed down to Stereo which was once a top pub in the west end that did a fabby night called Dub and Grub, which was just that. This Stereo's near Central Station but has a cool, hipster vibe. I noised up the poor barman and tried some naff celebrity I-Ken-You chat with boardgame geek and comedian Rab Florence.

And guess what! Turns out I ain't off the homebrew either. Right now I'm drinking my very last Reflection, the third beer I ever made and until V for Victory, the best. I think it's gone off a bit but it's still a solid pint. Bit twangy, yet still carries loads of flavour. Reflection was the brew that made me realise how easy it is to brew it yourself. And I kinda love it for that.

Anyhow, guess what! Turns out I ain't off the homebrewing at all. As I'm writing this I've a can of Cooper's Light Malt Extract bubbling away with a whole load of Cascade hops. Have been for almost 45 minutes. Once done I'm going to cool it quickly in a cold bath then add it to a Cooper's Premium IPA, my first (flawed) kit. I'm going to throw in some Liberty hops for the fermentation too. That'll (hopefully) give it plenty of flavour and aroma, while the boiled up Cascade will (hopefully) have upped the bitterness substantially. Wasn't the original plan, but I stumbled into the homebrew store Inn House Brewery and met Scott Williams, gave him some naff celebrity I-Dinnae- Ken-You chat then nodded sagaciously while he talked about isomerisation, the meaning of which I know not. Also got to see the very, very funky labels from the Drygate brewery I mentioned at the start of this post which brings me nicely to the end of this post cause that's my 45 minutes up.




 
 

V for Victory: Part II

So I finally got round to doing my label for Homebrew No. 5, V for Victory. I did labels for my previous four concoctions, and was keen to continue this tradition.

I thought it might be pretty clever to have a picture of Winston Churchill, doing his two-fingered salute, with a V mask from Alan Moore's classic V for Vendetta. For that wee personal touch I gave him the eyes offof one of the aliens from the sci-fi series V.

Pretty neat idea I thought, but it wasn't really working for me - even if I had gone back to tidy up the Photoshopping. See what I mean:

V for Victory - best review ever

'Ooh Ena, that stout is bleedin' lovely.'

Guess what?!

My first stout, my fifth homebrew ever, is utterly awesome. I've named it V for Victory.

To be fair, after a dreich January, and a long 31-day wait for it to condition, I could have drank fermented yak's pish and still thought it delicious. So I had another. And guess what?! It was utterly awesome too.

I shared some with my mum and dad. They also liked it.

My mum, whose own mum hails from Salford, said: "Your stout brings back memories of Ena Sharples and her two chums, Minnie Caldwell and Martha Longhurst, three of the original characters from Coronation Street, when it was in black and white, and they used to sit in the snug of the Rovers Return and drink half pints of stout, although one of them could have been drinking port and lemon or port and brandy."

I think that's the best beer review I've ever read. 

Anyhow, I've messed about with dry-hopping and that so I wanted to push this boat out a wee bit further. So, for you interested brewers: 
I made this with Cooper's select stout and a 1kg tin of Cooper's amber malt extract. Before adding any water I threw in a cup of strong, black coffee and a pint of hop tea, brewed with Liberty hops. Stirred energetically. Brought it up to 22 litres - slightly short the kit said for 23l. Original gravity was 1.042, and I pitched the yeast at 22C. One week later I bottled it (FG was 1.014) and left it for five long weeks. Worth the wait.

Would hoppily brew again. 

On the brew

Homebrew No.6 - St Peter's Golden Ale.

My poor wee beer blog has been awfully neglected of late. But I've been busy MAKING beer rather than writing about it (though I did pen this Christmas beer piece for The Herald). I've also started a novel. And I'm working on a wee ebook venture. So it's not out of laziness. Just so we're clear.

Anyhow, tomorrow, after a month off the booze*, I'm cracking open my fifth homebrew. It doesn't have a name yet - that'll come after the tasting, which, frankly, I'm a bit anxious about.

Homebrew No. 5 is a Cooper's stout kit with a medium malt extract. Also threw in a cup of strong, black coffee, and a pint of Liberty hop tea. So, yeah, might be awesome; might be rancid. It was bloody bitter with strong malty notes, hoppy aromas when I tasted it during the bottling late last year. The coffee was there but not overpowering. It's had five very long weeks to condition so fingers crossed these elements all come together in perfect, beautiful harmony.

One of the great things about homebrewing is the choice and freedom to hack beer kits. Boiling up hops, playing with different sugars, malts and yeasts. The next step, of course, is brewing from scratch using the raw ingredients rather than an extract. I'm not there yet. Maybe this time next year ...

Pictured here is my sixth brew. A St Peter's Golden Ale. It's coming along nicely thank you very much, but, like all decent homebrews, requires a bit of patience: it probably won't be ready until March.    


* I had a dry January a few years ago and felt great after it. Did it last year too and it was OK. This year it's just been miserable and pointless. Clearly something that should only be done once in a lifetime. Someone please remind me of this in 11 months' time.